Sippi Lovin'

I’d like very much for someone to invent and then market, at thrift store prices naturally, a device whereby my thoughts are immediately transcribed to print. I’ve had the idea in mind for some time now and, go figure, never had the time or energy to put it to words. Initially I pictured the device being activated on "thought-command," but now I’m thinking that all thoughts should be recorded and either deleted or siphoned off to an autobiography of sorts after "x" number of minutes/hours/days. It might also be nice if the transcription arranged the thoughts in a chronological or reasonable order, thereby rendering writers obsolete and I will no longer feel inadequate when posting here. On the upside, this would allow all of those great ideas we have while inebriated, running, falling asleep, etc. to be recorded for later review. On the downside, well, I guess Per would be out of a job and paranoia about Big Brother gettin’ up in our thoughts would only heighten. Hmmm...sounds worth it to me!

I know I've referenced or alluded to far more than my present workload will allow and while I can’t possibly cover all that I claimed I'd one day get to, allow me to explain the reasoning behind my earlier military-related postings. I had been observing a vocal and dense cohort of military personnel in Mississippi and wondered how the state compares to others in its service to country. In my first month in Hattiesburg I watched our local newsman report the death of young Mississippian men almost nightly. I also witnessed the very Walmart military recruitment scene depicted in Mr. Moore’s Fahrenheit 911 in that same month…just looking for a conspiracy really. I thought there might be a chance that folks in Washington were sending a greater percentage of Mississippians to fight "our" war in Iraq. As we all know by now, this is far from the richest state in the nation and its also one of the blackest. Maybe the conspiracy is there, again, I don’t have the time or energy to fully explore the question.

Oh, and before I forget, I’d also like to see Webster’s align its product with the thought-technology I’ve conceptualized. The way I see it, all we'd have to do is think, "Idolater, son of a bitch, what the hell is that?" And then BAM…

idolater (§-0däl-d-dr( n 1 : a worshiper of idols 2 : a person that admires or loves intensely and often blindly [Middle French idolatre, from Late Latin idolatres, from Greek eidÇ-latres, from eidÇlon "idol" + -latr‘s "worshiper"]

Pretty sweet, huh?

I see blogger ruined my phonetic spelling. Damn blogger, I worked on that instead of my paper!